Me vs. The Minivan

Posted on 09.19.06 in Family and there are 14 comments.

I’ve recently discovered that there are many injustices that accompany becoming a family of five.

Here are a few:
-We can’t sit in a booth when we eat out.
-If we should ever win a vacation, we’ll have to leave one child at home because most vacation prize packages are for families of 4.
-Most restaurant tables are made for 4.
-One family member will always have to ride alone in rollercoaster cars.
-If we decide to share a hotel room, someone has to sleep on the floor.

Here’s the real kicker for me:
-We have to get a minivan.

I never thought I’d say it, but we’re currently faced with the cold hard truth that a minivan is certainly in our future.

I am morally opposed to owning a minivan.

I’m not vain. I just don’t want to be seen driving a minivan.

My husband, much to my dismay, has already been led astray and the other night he actually said, “I was just daydreaming....wouldn’t it be great if (a friend who has a brand new, tricked out Honda Odessey) gave us their minivan?”

To which I lovingly replied, “Sweetheart, that’s a waste of a daydream.”

But the truth is that we probably can’t fit three carseats in our sedan. SUV’s are gas guzzlers and frankly wouldn’t be as comfy for the kids.

So, because I’m a loving mom and I just want what’s best for my little ones, I’ll suck it up, lay down my pride and spend $20,000 on something I don’t really like.

Honestly, though, I’ve never thought poorly of anyone else who drives a minivan. I just don’t want one.

So what are your thoughts on minivans? Do you drive one? How does that make you feel? Which one would you recommend?

The Comments:

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We have four little ones and had to graduate to a the minivan a few years back.  Well, it’s my wife’s car- I got her old small SUV which only seats 4 total. 

I have to say there is not a day that my wife doesn’t talk about getting something other than a minivan.  And she wants something bigger, taller, and gas-guzzling.  Like a surburban.  She saw that they have seating up to 9 and is all excited about that.  NOt that we’re having any more kids, but at least she could take all kids plus the carpool kids home from school.  But 30-40K+ for this enhancement does not make sense to me!

About a year ago, Mrs. Euphrony was in a bad accident.  It totaled her car and, as we looking for a new car, we decided to go with the minivan.  We were planning at the time to expand the family from three to four (as they say in business, grow the family organically) and we considered the options.  Sticking with the SUV, we would either spend X for a nice minivan with extras or spend the same amount on a SUV that came basic.  The minivan came standard with rear A/C, unlike the SUV, and we felt sorry for Little Euphrony as she sweltered in the back seat as the air could not get to her.  Also, with the minivan, the 3rd row seats fold down (each individually) to provide enough room to fit our house in back.  The SUV, by comparison, only fit the living room.

We bought a Toyota Sienna and have loved it.  The milage we get isn’t huge, but better than most SUV’s can get.  No regrets here; I just had to swallow my pride at first and say “I can be a minivan dad” and once I got past that, it has been nice.  Kind of like carrying my daughter’s pink princess backpack around for her.

Kat, I did a search for minivan alternatives, because I feel your pain, and I don’t have a busy work schedule this month. Y’all still have time to escape the minivan brigade! Ok, here’s the list:

Subaru Forester
Volkswagen Passat wagon
Mazda 5 (a minivan, but it looks cool..er)
Dodge Magnum

It was nice meeting/hanging out with y’all briefly. Maybe longer next time? Have a wonderful day in the Lord!! Holla…

Oh, here’s my blog address, too, in case d hasn’t passed it along. It’s kind of bare bones for now, but I might repost some of my old entries soon.

http://sufficientgrace76.blogspot.com

Hellooo?  C’mon:  The world says mini-vans are uncool.

Therefore, they’re cool.  It’s that simple. 

Seriously: We got a ‘98 Nissan Quest.  Put a bunch of surf and Costa Rica stickers on it and stuff, and can carry our surfboards around in it. 

They’re safer and smarter than SUV’s, which, fairly broadcast, “I’m insecure.”

Sure, I’m insecure, too, but I don’t broadcast it except on the radio.

Brant

Dave - wow. Four little ones. Any advice on how to handle being outnumbered? I have to agree with you $30-40k for a depreciating car would be very tough to swallow. Although, I must admit $20k for “boredom on wheels” is a bit of a horse pill as well.

Euphrony - I LOVED you pink princess backpack comment. What a wonderful analogy. I do like a good analogy. Yes, the Sienna is at the top of our list. We currently have a Hyundai Sonata (which we adore) so the Entourage is in contention as well. I’m sure we’ll fall into line and say we love it once we own it. It’s just actually paying money for it that I’m having a hard time with.

John - Thanks for the blog address. I really, really liked your most recent entry. I hope you’ll post often. And thanks so much for looking for those alternatives. We’d looked at some, but we hadn’t seen that Mazda 5 and it looks rather promising. The only other vehicle like that that we’d seen that was in our price range was the Ford Something and when we went to test drive it the rearview mirror broke off in my husband’s hand. Not a good sign. We’ll have to check out that Mazda. Thanks! I do hope we’ll see you again soon.

Brant - I’m not inherently cool like you are. I can’t pull off the minivan thing. So we get a minivan, I’m just going to have to buy denim applique jumpers for every holiday too because style is out the window. (Surf stickers and surfboards would look a bit odd here in waco. Perhaps I can permanently attach my mountain bike, though...)

Thanks for posting guys! It does encourage me that cool dj’s, musicians and self proclaimed know-it-alls have minivans. Perhaps there is hope.

Nah, no hope.  It really makes no difference how cool you are, how stylish or anything.  The instant you get in a minivan, you’ve got socks with sandals, a visible wedgie, and tape holding your crooked glasses together.  Fact of life.

I’m really completely useless in this discussion.  I don’t have any kids yet, I’m oppoesd to SUVs, and the word minivan only makes me think of the 1987 Ford Windstar that my family had while I was growing up.  I’m just commenting here because… huh… I really don’t have a good reason.  I like to bug you, maybe?

Well, minivans are great when you have a family of at least five members. Most of them are better than we think and have a good design, as well.

Hi!  Just happened upon your site. I had the same issue last year.  We had our third kid and it was too squishy in the station wagon.  Plus, it was very old.  I don’t like the way mini-vans handle - too top heavy - and they make me nervous on the highway. Especially when my husband drives.

We looked and looked and settled on the Toyota Highlander.  If you look at a Consumer Report, it’s really no worse than the mini vans for gas mileage, plus they have new handling equipment to protect against roll-overs and the Highlander is small.  Plus, the newest version can come as a hybrid - to save even more on gas.

It’s more expensive than a minivan, I think - but we got one that was a year old and totally equipped with more than I would have wanted (a DVD player?!!. We like it so far.

I still think it’s not big enough but it seats 7 with the back seat up. Then there’s no room for luggage but we can fit the car seats across the middle seat if we need to go on a trip. 

Another option I liked was the Chrysler Pacifica.  Very cool

Good luck!

-cathy

Florist and Cathy,
Thanks so much for stopping by and taking the time to comment.

We’ve looked at the Highlander, but part of the issue is that until we got pregnant we’d really been trying to put as much of our money as possible into our mortgage to see how quickly we can pay it off. Consequently, our savings is a bit low and we only have 7 months to save for this vehicle.

We spent the first few years of our marriage driving cruddy cars so that we could eventually buy one outright. We did that two years ago (it was the first car we’d ever owned that was made in the same decade that we bought it.)

All that to say, we can’t save up for a Highlander in this short period of time...so we’re destined for a minivan (or maybe that Mazda 5). Perhaps someday we’ll upgrade the the Highlander. We’ve definitely heard good things about it.

I do like the Chrysler Pacifica. Does it seat 7 too?

Minivans are awesome.  They are very safe and roomy and scream, “I LOVE MY KIDS SAFETY AND PRACTICALLITY MORE THAN COOLNESS AND MY EGO!” Plus, if you look for one used with low miles, you can often get a good deal.  We got an older used Windstar with 58,000 miles for < $6k.  Lower payments and money in the bank is always cool.  Stations wagons are nice options.  Unfortunately, third seats are going out of style, so you don’t have too many choices there.

Regarding the safety factor, it is good to remember that (even at $3/gallon) gas is generally much cheaper than medical bills. 

Doug

Kat,

First time I’ve ever been to your site.  It’s awesome and I’ll have to visit more often.

Shaun drives a mini van and he’s “cool” right?

Seriously, we have 4 kids too so a mini van was a necessity to say the least.  We chose the GMC Safari because of the price and the seating options (seats 8).  We bought it new in 2002 while living in the UK.  Since we’re military, we ordered through AAFES and had it delivered to a US dealer while we were on leave in the States.  We drove it for 6 weeks on vacation in the US and put 6137 miles on it during that time!  Our family is quite spread out to say the least. 

We then shipped it to the UK where we drove it for another 2 years before moving back to the States in 2004.  It’s been to the UK, France, Germany and about 20 states in the US.

I love the fact that it sits up higher than most mini vans.  This was a great thing when driving on the other side of the road for 2 years and trying to see to pass.

Now that two of ours are teenagers whom we “force” to travel with the family, we love the fact that each kid has his/her own corner in the van with a folddown center seat which nicely serves as a card table, drink holder, and physical barrier.

Tip:  regardless of what type vehicle you may buy, before you allow anyone under the age of 21 inside, completely remove the seats and cover the entire carpeting area with carpet protectors.

We purchased those heavy duty vinyl carpet protectors and covered all the carpeted areas.  They are much easier and cheaper to clean than carpet.  Besides being used as the “family” vehicle, we often add the dog; or carry Scouts on camping trips, youth groups to camp or skiing, or ladies from the ARC on shopping trips. 

It’s not nearly as clean and shiny as it was when it was delivered, but it’s now filled with many more memories.

As for my husband who was “terrified” of being the minivan dad, I jus reminded him of the precious cargo we were hauling and he was OK with that.

If you can find a Ford Aerostar, they are great too.  Ours was totaled in the UK when I was hit from behind.  We managed to put over 50,000 miles on that van years in Europe and it served our family very well.

Beth

They are very safe and roomy and scream, “I LOVE MY KIDS SAFETY AND PRACTICALLITY MORE THAN COOLNESS AND MY EGO!”

Doug - thank you for today’s dose of conviction. I just really enjoy loathing minivans, but I know you’re very right. Perhaps I’ll just have to pierce my nose or dye my hair purple to compensate for the vehicle I drive. (If my parents are reading this - I’m just kidding. Probably.)

Thanks for commenting Doug! I especially like this line:

Regarding the safety factor, it is good to remember that (even at $3/gallon) gas is generally much cheaper than medical bills.

Beth - Thanks for stopping by! I do hope you’ll visit often. Do you have a blog?

Shaun drives a minivan? I didn’t know this. I clearly have a line in my contract with clients that states, “Due to personal moral beliefs, I cannot develop web sites for anyone who currently or has previously owned or driven a minivan.” Hmmm....I’ll have to chat with him about this.

So, I have to ask: did you drive an “American” minivan when you were in the UK? I mean where was the steering wheel? How does that work? I think that would profoundly confuse me.

In reality, I’m actually looking forward to getting the minivan (Did I just say that?). I think my girls will really enjoy it. Thanks for the recommendations. We’ll probably really start looking into it around the end of the year - I’ll let you know what we end up with.

I would point at you and snicker, Kat, but then the Lord would either convict me or mysteriously change my circumstances so that I find myself in a position where a minivan is the only logical choice for me… so, I think I’ll just shut my big yap and say nothing.

C-Hammer,
I think I’ve found my solution.

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